Cried

I’m crying today

In the midst of the November rain

Feels the worst thing happens to me

Right in the middle of a war scene

I’m crying today

Shamelessly and drown in sorrow

I feel the trickled of the tears

Melting me down into a melted salt water

I’m crying today

Showed my vulnerable side

Neither sympathy nor empathy

Covering for my deepest emotion

I’m crying today

Cowered in the center

Keeps in equilibrium state

No matter what cause the shattering

I’m crying today

Until the last of the leaked tears

Covered me like a different kinds of silencing

Eventhough it happens in just a minutes

This poem inspired by a movie called crazy little thing called love…

Sometimes when we reminisce the past

There is a slight pain we feel deep inside

When we remember that special someone

Whom we take notes on everything about...

I wonder where they gone

The one with the piercing eyes

When we glance back

Only the warmth remains…

Is it only half of the world

That seems to be feeling the same way

When the leaves takes turn to become gray

Only the commited one rejoices the glory…

Heartbreaking

It’s just like the rain on November

When the chill feels right up to my sleeves

It’s happens when I remember the story of you

What you did behind my back

It keeps getting to me

To feel the first pain in the naïve ways

Like a marked stamped on my forehead

Look what a foolish girls I am

The fears of losing you

Affected me in everywhere

Threatening my sane self to stand up in the cold floor

Reaching for every possibility that can hold me

I’m just listening to the words you say

Never speak up as I should have

Like there is a hundred pounds of chain on my mouth

Stopping me from bursting in front of you

It’s like a journey on the long road

Never seem to stop anywhere

The never ending cycle

Makes me numb in every sense of life

I keep enduring it

Even when what I supposed to do is leaving you

But when every time i tried

It’s like a thousand thorns keeping me stilled in this desolate place

Just Once

 In the midst of the afternoon break

You walk by me and with a glance I caught you

The whole time you through, all eyes are upon you

Thinking something you don’t know

Thinking you were screwed

Thinking you were cool

Thinking that you know a thousand ways to break a fragile heart

Thinking what if you belong to me

Just for once

Your sincere heart makes me turn to stare

Someone will said that you were a devils with child’s face

Instead I know who you truly were

Its make me quiver just to think again

Even when the whole town just thinking something you don’t know

Thinking that I was wrong

Thinking you were always right

Thinking that something about you that doesn’t seem to care

Thinking what if you belong to me

Just for once

Imagining things that doesn’t suit you

Risking it all by coming all the way in front you

Said that thousand words that keep harassing me

Even when the question showing from your face

Something that you don’t really know

Thinking you were alone there

Thinking I’m a fool for feeling these ways

Thinking wisely what words I must say

Thinking what if you belong to me

Just this once 

Dreamland

I have walking through this piece of dreamland

When everyone is like a twist in the mist

Nobody ever protected

Even though the spirit is there to lead the journey

Echoing just outside the windows of my soul

Is it just me?

Talking to whomever I’m waiting from the outside?

Or just me ignoring the fact when the oblivious thing doesn’t exist?

All is really leading to some choices

Although we already keep in our little thing deep in our hearts

What do we wanted?

What do this existence is for?

And...

What do our choice that will mirror to our entire act?

Slowly the resemblance will be dominating

Instead of leading it’s lead to destruction

Speaking of truth that all along this journey

Only met with ignorance

The truth is nobody ever known

Until we stepped out from this dream that will always capturing every one of us.

belief

In the land faraway

Across a million stars

The dawn in my head started to lose

Breaking me and loosening me into pieces

I kept hearing an echo

Like splattered across the universe in my imagination

How far I am in making mistakes?

Like I already done it in a thousand imaginative ways

The vast land beheld in the corner of my eyes

Keep whispering to me

About a stories

That wanted me to unfold it secret

I forge it

Days and days without stopping

But it never letting me inside

 Just enough in pushing me in

But never ushered me in their territory

I’m feeling hopelessly naïve

For the second the times keep threatening me

What in the world I let myself into?

But I know it all along

Just like the wilderness in me

Those keep letting me know

The answer is in my choice

Just 24

I’m 24 reaching out for 17

Never move forward

Making my age seem so defenseless

When people keep criticize

I just keep looking up just be myself like I always wanted

Why do they keep whispering?

When all I want is the best thing I can feel

Like a raindrops falling to the earth

Makes everything grow into their nature

I just want to be somebody that can rely to me

Even when I’m old enough to reach out for 17

I’m 24 reaching out to the journey of my life

But there was always something keeping me distance from it

Like it occurred every time I just step into it

Never seem to reach it but always been able to clearly see it

I’m like an addict for the freedom that within my reach

Fueling my rage with a hunger that I always suppressed

I’m 24 reaching to the constant life of span

That will never stopped

Even when the civilization keeps on destroyed and rebuilt

I will always be 24 times 3 older than now

Makes me more fragile than anything else

I’m 24 reaching for my dreams

Beneath the inferior of my mind

Someone keeps whispering to me

To just live for the moment

Enjoy the complicated feeling of life

Endure it because it will always be the first step

Into the journey of every scene in my life

Regret

One day when my life completed just the way it meant

You come and shatter my hearts just the way before

I still remember the times

When the world seems filling with foolish hopes

The inner of me keeps raging with war

When my feelings started to collide against my will

One day when I first met you

Never knew I could feels this way

When the cold started to creep to me

Just watch your face makes my day begin

The ray of beautiful light

That’s what you are to me

One day when you noticing me

Seems there is possibility in everything

I feel the butterfly in me

Keep flying endlessly rhyming with the beating of my heart

Just need you to smile

To make me whole always

One day when you out of my sight

My dreams crushed with the never ending regrets

I keep thinking it was only a one sided feels

Never knew it would be such in pain to never met you again

When the regret was

I never show how depth I feel to you

One day when I recall the pretty eyes of yours

My hearts will always flutter

Why do I keep remembering you?

Even when you will never come to me again

Just like that I pushed you away from me in every sense

Even when you keep haunted my dreams

But one day you came again

When I met somebody worth to love for

Doesn’t know that I just suppressed this feelings for you

When the truth is I never ever forget about you

So don’t come back to me

Even when the depth of our eyes showed pain for regretting